A New Begining

2009-10-01T08:29:00.000-07:00

Hey. Im not sure if im suppose to be happy or sad rite now.
Well, in 5hrs time, i'll be flying to India..yeepeee huh? nah~~
dont feel like being happy no more..
i heard her cry n it brought memories of previous incidents..

Looks like ive got to go away for a mnth again..
baby~
I LOOOOOVE YOU SOOOOO SOOOOO MUCH~!
I wish i could fight my way thru this but ive tried my hardest~
im gonna be back soon okay
ntgs gonna change~ unless i come back wif a stench~ :)
Im gonna miss you soooooo much~!
If theres internet access there i swear u'll be the 1st person i'll contact~
Please dont be sad baby~
ure a strong woman n i know tat!
stay strong and always be happy~ the legal way!
n time will go by fast!
nvr do things the hard way, it wont do u any good~
be positive n be free~ the legal way!
dont listen to negetive comments if it dosent help u in any way! GOT IT!?
please take care of yourself~
dont dissapoint me in anyway~ u havent so far~ keep up the good work! ;)
Ure the best Girlfriend ever! SWEAR!
im gonna go sleep now~

im gonna come back and im gonna tell u many many stories!

LOVE YOU MANYMANYMANY PLENTY MONSTER ROLLING ON THE GROUND RAWRING AND LAUGHING WHILE THEY SEE SOMEONE DROP FROM THE CHAIR COS THE PERSON TERPERANJAT WHEN HE SAW A MONSTER~!

GONNA MISS YOU BABY~!
MUACKS!

2009-09-17T12:58:00.000-07:00

sumtimes i wonder why u still keep stuffs to ureself~
even if u say u dont, u can nvr hide it from me~
ure reasons may say "i dont know"
but logically things happen for a reason n
if it happens to u, u must know the reason,
i wont take "i dont know " for an excuse,
u wanna gain my trust,
stop wad ure doing~

I know stuffs tat u think i dont know.
I need to trust u, but ure stopping me in the process.
If there is sumthing tat ure afraid to let out bcos of some reasons,
im sorry but im afraid to hold on to you if ure afraid to be open to me.

I dont believe tat there is no more to be told,
cos the things uve shown me is not convincing me.

Tell me stuffs bfor others do,
cos sumhow sumone is gonna tell me sumthing.
the outcome is up to you.

2009-09-14T08:51:00.000-07:00

Here is just sumthing i wanna share to the world;

It comes again, another month of absence,

Cant take no more cos i got no more tolerance,

Sick to the mind when they order me todo stuffs,

Kills my heart when they take me away from my other half,

I hate you, u awaken my conscience,

Making fear take control of me from every entrance,

And God, gimme a lighter sentence,

Cos this time its no coincidence.

Afraid of losing my soul is sumthing i have to look over,

Cos once sumone wins it, its game over,

So the second i stop breathing i'll know its the day,

I'll surrender my life cos u gave my soul away,

So for now, i'll just pray, hoping at the end of the day,

Nothing Turns Grey~

Shine my road till i come back~

Peace~

I love my Soul

2009-08-01T16:46:00.000-07:00

Hey Morning dearest~
I miss you~ SOOOOOOOOO MUCH~!
Well my batt is dead..Urgh~!
How i wish i can hear ure voice rite now~

Well 2 nites in 1 club concludes how i feel when i do stuffs without her.
never tot my groove could dissapear.
dancing to ure fav songs alone is heartbreaking.
i should have paid more attention to my surroundings.
it sucks to know ure at home bored n unhappy n yet im in a club.
this pain will not go away till the day i make it up to u.
no more clubbing for hamster till the day his love tags along.
SWEAR!

Well the 5th month is coming n i just cant wait till the next weekend~
i might not be able to be around on our actual date, im sorry.
but note tat the next weekend will be ntg but smiles n laughter.
im glad tat ive met u Zee~
srsly~ ure the reason i wake up every morning just so i go to work,
ure the reason i smile every morning when i wake up,
ure the reason why i feel life is easy,
ure the reason why i still strive hard in my life,
ure incredible!
u dont know how strong u make me feel whenever u say "I Love You"
my hand shivers typing this, holding my tears.
just thinkgking of you rite now makes me happy.
i Love the way u talk to me,
i Love the way u reason wif me,
i Love the way u joke wif me,
I Love the way u hold me,
i Love the way our lips touch,
i Love the way u smile,
i Love the way u Love me,
Everything seems so perfect when ure by my side.
Sure theres complications, but i love the way we make up for it at the end.
You're Amazing!
I cant afford much, but swear i'll try my bestest to make u happy!
Guide me Zee~
Hold my hand and tag me along in your journey~
Lets learn life together~
Let me take my last breath in ure arms~
I wanna grow old with you Zee~
No Doubt~
I Love You!

2009-07-19T04:24:00.000-07:00

Today turn out to be very2 fun~

Baby cheered me up by surprising me to e2max~

We played L4D online together in a room just 2 of us~

She cooked for me nasi goreng n sambal sotong~

But Baby got really2 sick after all that~

Im sorry to put trough u all this baby~

I should have just let u rest today~

U slept at 4.30am bcos of me~

I am very grateful for everything that you've done for me baby!

Thank you very2 much~

I LOVE YOU SOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH~!

Please get well soon~ =(

18 is canceled of from now of~

No more of tat special day~

2009-07-18T02:03:00.000-07:00

Being Sick is Boring~

Being home on a Saturday is more boring~

Being alone is very very boring~

But beiing Sick, Alone and to be home on a Saturday is the worst~!

Ouh yah its 18 today~

Well im not sure where my friends are at this moment,

no one seems to be online~

Mum went out sumwhere~

Sis sleeping over at some friend's place~

Girlfriend is out shopping wif her sis at Sentosa~

Guess i'll just sit n rot~

WHAT A FUCKED UP WEEKEND~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The 2 most important day of a NS man is Saturday and Sunday~

cos its the only official off day~ but im at home~

Should have just sit at work~

Pissed~

Thres no food at home~

My Tv got no channels~

my House is empty since no one is home~

Im Running around the house scavanging for internet so i could text my GF~

But now she Busy at Sentosa with adek~

I've vomited thrice even on an empty stomach~

ONLY GOD KNOWS HOW SAD N PATHETIC I FEEL RIGHT NOW~!

"Screw sacrifices, i would have done it if u were in my place."

Its called Love~

2009-07-18T01:43:00.000-07:00

STUPID SICKNESS!!!!

FUCKOFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-07-08T12:49:00.000-07:00

Life is full of hardships~

Life is full of surprises~

Life is full of shit~

Life is just the way it is~

Always have fun no matter wad ure going trough~

Keep your head up even when things are at the lowest~

Be who you say you are~

Always remember, theres no such thing as no positive side~

You have to see deep~

Let your mind free~

Follow your heart~

Im always madly in love with you~!

I love us~

I love wad we have!

Im not letting go of this~

I'll be as close as possible~

I love you~!

how much i miss you~

2009-07-05T08:21:00.000-07:00

i miss my baby soooo much~

the moment u went out tat door and the buzzer went toot toot tooot tooot~

a frown came on to my face~

i just miss you~

well i turned on the click sound on my hp too, just so i wont miss u so much at work..

i hope time flies at work~

i've not much to blog about tonite.,

so~ nite2~!

I LOVE YOU BABY!

2009-07-05T00:00:00.000-07:00

I miss my baby alot~!

im gg to be w/o her today..haiz~

i love u baby!

if silence is wad u want~

2009-06-27T15:37:00.000-07:00

i'm sorry, really i am.

never did i expect this would happen.

maybe you've got my words in a tangle.

or maybe ure view of it is different,

but trust me, i have no intention of leaving.

take ure time to heal,

i tried to talk n it looks like i was shut away.

maybe im exagerating but somehow im hurt too.

i was thought by you, to share the pains we have.

looks like u backed out.

sad when i texted you goodnite n love msgs thrice n not to be replied by the same love.

well if silence is what u prefer, take it.

2009-06-27T09:52:00.000-07:00

PAIN~

goodnite love you~

dont have to reply.

2009-06-27T09:05:00.000-07:00

Life is hard, no doubt bout tat,

u got two options,

deal wid it or live wid it.

no matter wad, u got to be strong.

watever comes at you just take it.

no matter how hard it is just go trough it.

why fall when theres nothing u gain?

keep ure head up and always look on the brighter side.

theres nothing u get by making a frown but more sadness.

im no life expert but ive been trough hell more than u can imagine.

trust me, theres no point being gloomy, just take it and go~

Went out wif Zee, her dad and Jazz today.

it was full of laughter i tell u~

we watched 1min of fame, it was lame... srsly~

me and zee den went to Sentosa to drop by on her friends bdae party.

we 1st went window shopping at Vivo,

we came across this pet store.

it was weirdly sad n painful there.. for me~

there was this dog which was just lying down staring at the gate wif its eyes wide open,

it reminded me of how it was in DB.

just waiting for someone to open the gate n take u away.

no one can feel this pain..it was incredibly painful~

we than went to the party.

i was able to see my baby laugh like mad today..

it was fun to see her happy like tat. =)

we den went home.

2009-06-22T09:16:00.000-07:00

I miss my baby so much~!

i just love the way u give me attention~

ure kisses are magical i tell u~

it makes me tingly everytime our lips touch~

sumtimes when im not wid u, i tend to hypervantilate.

even at this moment, im trying my best to catch my breath~

im missing u at this moment, and im gonna miss u more at work tmrw~

cant wait till friday! im so gonna be proud of u! =)

Well time for me to sleep now~

I LOVE YOU JAZZYLLA!

2009-06-21T06:52:00.000-07:00

Went to the library today~

yeah i did!

just to play sims3 wif baby love~ heh!

Never tought i will share time wif my gf by playing game.

I experience alot of new things today.

Its highly unimaginable~ Nuff said!

Im bored at the moment...

Baby is buzy wif adek & mum~

wonder wad they doing..

Well i guess tats it for today..

2009-06-20T09:43:00.000-07:00

Well i've not much to say at this moment,

just wanna clear things out.

I have fun every sec when im wid u.

Dont Ever say tat u take the fun out of me,

Dont Say nothing when theres something,

I Can feel U like How i feel the Beat.

You're my Soul, Remember that~

I love You baby!

2009-06-19T11:14:00.000-07:00

well im back to work.

Kinda suck coz its boring n tiring at the same time.

funny thing is im not doing anything.

Thursday was 18 Jun.

I was in camp so we couldnt celebrate our special date.

So we made up for it n its today.

We went to Dl0 to go see the heats for the comp.

It was a turnoff rlly.

i only bounced my hand to one performance.

After the comp, me n my baby boo dance the nite way.

Sure there was cyphers, but surprisingly i entered only twice.

It was still tiring though.

Well it was a Fun, a little dissapointing and super wild day.

Sticked to my words and no cups were needed.

Nuff said~

2009-06-17T04:04:00.000-07:00

went to baby's place today~

Nuff said!

5 Fingers wrapped around me,

1 Stroke,

It felt great.

I LOVE YOU ZEE~!

thanks for massaging my back.

2009-06-15T08:46:00.000-07:00

i love u baby~!
ure the freshest GF ever! *kening naik2*
sumtimes i wonder how u do it.
im gonna see u tmrw weeeeeeeee~
dont sleep late aite~
im gonna go eat den go sleep.
Thanks for the taxi cash baby~
Nite nite Baby Boo~!
Muacks!

Sorry bout this afternoon~
Was abit upset..
it dosent bother me anymore now, i guess.
Love u always!

2009-06-14T09:07:00.000-07:00

these feelings i have are real, no doubt.

and no doubt the stronggest feeling is Love.

talking to u just now clears the fog out of my mind,

im gonna state this here n now.

im not gonne run away,

im not gonna leave you,

im gonna love u every single day,

i'll treasure u,

coz from now on,

Zee,

You're the air tat i breathe,

You're the blood tat keeps me running,

You're my Soul.

I love you and tats a Nuff Said!

2009-06-13T21:14:00.000-07:00

im beginin to understand abit now,

i cant do it by myself,

tats y i have u.

but the problem is, im afraid to tag u along in my life.

coz i dont think u deserve the pain.

i dont like hurting u,

as i read ure posts,

in came to me tat, ive coz too much hurt to u..

one can only feel the pain when one knows one made the other cry,

not once, not twice, n sadly not thrice,

time after time, day after day.

and when one is a man and the other is a lady,

one shall feel extreme guilt.

tell me.. wad must one do now?

2009-06-13T10:12:00.000-07:00

Back.

Wanna thank the people tat were there for me when i was home,

appreciate it alot!

not only tat, u guys brought me to watch a 3D movie~

damn cool~!

i had fun today~

thanks alot guys!

Hey baby,

It's nice to be greeted by ure love the moment i stepped in the hse~

the fight is finally over..

no more waiting..

thanks for waiting for me baby~

ure my soul, no doubt~

Promise you it wont happen again.

I love you~

These feelings inside.

What are they?

Happy?

Sad?

Mad?

Dissapointed?

All i know is, i dont feel good.

to tell you the truth, i wasnt ready to step out of the gate~

i never knew why..

people were counting my date of release day by day,

while i sit back n just ponder,

wad's this pain tat i feel..

waking up to a teary eye,

know doubt i felt ure tear, even in my sleep.

and to come back with a smile is just impossible rite now.

how can the body smile when the soul tears.

Two words.

A DISSAPOINMENT.

its all over my face.

2009-05-14T08:35:00.000-07:00

Today was the best day!

Baby brought me to Sentosa to try things i nvr tried before.

We went to LUGE~!

SO FAST~~~~~!

thank you for the surprise baby~!

after that still got sky tower thing~!

so high~! U make me do the craziest things baby!

after tat we went to the 4D cinema thingy~!

Omg SO SCARY!~

We den took a nap at siloso~

We waited for 7.40 p.m. coz we wanted to watch the Song Of The Sea~

IT WAS DOPE!

I'm Glad i had u to share this wonders with baby~!

Thank You So Much Baby~!

From a street cypher battle~

To A Wonderful Love Story~

I thank u Allah~

I kneel down to u n pray~

i beg u, spare my life~

if not mine, spare the person i most love~

u may break my trust, my hope, my beliefs and my strengths~

but i beg u dont break my love one's heart~

its all i ask for~

Yo zee~

I Love You~

Wad more can i say~

You're EVERYTHING~

Nuff Said!

Family~

stay together!

u guys need one another!

smile and laughters are the key~

Stay Strong People!

Apologies to u all!

Be Back Soon~

May Peace Be Upon You~

2009-05-11T01:29:00.000-07:00

its gonna be temporary,

when im back, the streets will be ours once again..

I love u baby boo~

Till my last breath~ Swear!

2009-05-10T11:10:00.000-07:00

Every goodnite is hurting me,

Every goodbye is killing me,

Every sec without her is painful,

I Love You Zee~

I really really do~

2009-05-07T06:54:00.000-07:00

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2009-05-05T08:17:00.000-07:00

I've been thingking abit lately,

hahaha,

yes! THINGKING!

i think i wanna quit thingking~

hahahaha! ok this is out of bordem~

I LOVE YOU ZEE!

2009-05-03T10:25:00.000-07:00

IM GONNA MISS YOU!

2009-05-03T09:38:00.000-07:00

Well its 4th may now,
another month pass,
ure sumthing different u noe tat~
the way u make me feel,
i have never been so happy my entire life, Honest~!
i've never had a feeling like this towards sumone before~
u make me go crazy girl~
we dont fight,
we dont argue,
we dont missunderstand.
this journey,
i dont dare say it's perfect,
it's happy,
yeah~ its a very very happy journey~
it's the best adventure i've been trough.
HAPPY 2MNTHS BABY~!
I LOVE U SO DAMN MUCH~!

2009-05-03T00:55:00.000-07:00

these 3 days wid u,
these hrs wid u,
its been amazing,
i've never thought i would come to a point where i will
appreciate someone so much,
i'm srry u have to go trough all this again,
i'm srry for creating all these troubles in ure life,
you've been there for me ever since day 1 and now im leaving, again.
i am truely truely srry~

Please baby girl,
stay strong for us,
i beg u,
dont u cry please..
i know it hurts.
i just cant handle it when u cry.

well here i am trying my hardest not to tear,
hahaa~
i'll be strong for us too aite.
n when im gone,
i promise u, when i'm back, the love for u will never lessen,
it will change, yes, it will grow strongger.
till my last breathe babe
I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH~
nothing's gonna change it.

Apologies to LUMINIQ~
paisey is all i can say.
this is how ashame i am now.
i am truely sry guys,
Fiq, be strong, ure a good crew leader and i mean it.
guys, focus aite.
I wish u all the best~!

2009-04-23T06:52:00.000-07:00

Hey~
take a note people,
the best thing in life is the scariest thing to keep,
coz ure afraid of letting it go,
not by own realese,
maybe by further or much greater elements,
ever since u ask, "what happens if i die",
it got me thinking,
would god be tat cruel?
to tell u the truth,
ure the reason i go on living my life,
w/o u, i guess i'll still be in tat cell.

God, everynight i put my hands together,
i pray upon u,
i ask,
i beg,
"Do not take my happiness away from me"
"take anything else but pls, not my happiness"
"shes all i ever think about"
"i beg u, forgive my sins"
"amin".

2009-04-22T16:20:00.000-07:00

2 months now,
what a wonderful feeling,
swear~! i've nver felt anything like this before,
whats ure magic girl?
how do u make me smile in the morning?
how do u make me smile before i go to bed?
just thinking of u rite now blows my mind,
u make me wanna do things beyond my capabilities,
no one can do it like you~
I Love You Baby~

2009-04-18T12:50:00.000-07:00

Being with u makes me smile every moment,
i'm proud to say you're the best Girlfriend i've ever had,
If u dont believe me, look at my smile.
I Love You Baby!

Luminiq
The family i wanna be stuck with forever!
Crazy shit everyday!

2009-04-11T12:19:00.000-07:00

looks like im 20 today
cant i postpone to 4 more months?
things change alot this year,
i feel very much blessed this year,
i've got the greatest give ever,
i've got good friends,
i've got the dopest brothers,
i've got a dope sister,
i've got the best girlfriend ever,
wad more can a guy ask?

Thanx people,
but u noe wad?
who needs a birthday wif the people i have around?
everyday is like a birthday.
You guys make me feel special everyday,
every single one of u.

2009-04-09T13:52:00.001-07:00

can i postpone my birthday to next 4 mnths?

2009-04-09T13:25:00.000-07:00

i noe my voice suck~!
haters pls dont comment,
no point, i wont entertain.

DB ROCKS~!

2009-04-09T13:01:00.001-07:00

"Trust me~
I'll try my best to make u happy,
no more sad tears,no more misery~"

2009-04-09T11:37:00.000-07:00

WHY AM I STILL TEARING?!

Love~

2009-04-09T10:44:00.000-07:00

Is there a stronger word than love?
Cos wad i feel for u is not love,
its much much stronger,
my face don't show,
my reactions cant be foreseen,
my words are not good enough,
there's nothing that i can do to surpass my gratitude for you,
"thank you" is never enough,
"i love u" is never enough,
"i miss u" is never enough,
"sorry" is not good enough,
...
...
Sorry~
Thank u~
I love u~
I miss u~
Love u always~~

Its always hard for me when it comes to relations,
i don't trust enough,
i'm too afraid,
to let my heart astray,
but this time its different,
im going all out,
my heart tells me shes the one,
i feel it.

"If its wrong to love you, Than my heart just wont let me be right"

"I love u Nur Jazzylla Binte Norazam"

2009-03-10T18:32:00.000-07:00

i love u~

2009-03-09T11:16:00.000-07:00

i was crying like n idiot the night before,
i was laughing at the same time,
i was smiling when it all stop,
i was back to crying after tat,
i was confused.

all i wanted was sumone to hold on to,
i kept wishing hard,
it kept me awake till 6,
i woke up at 7.30 and there she was,
my wish came true.

Zee baby,
i cant thank u enuff for the things u've done for me,
i cant say anything tat can describe wad u mean to me,
i cant think of anymore sweet thinks to say anymore,
i cant say i love u coz this feeling is much greater den love,
u've got me speechless,
u've got me tongue tied,
u're able to surprise me everyday wif no flaws,
u're able to make me smile at my worst times,
u're able to be there everytime i needed u,
u're able to make me think of u every nite,
u fed me,
u've put me to sleep,
u've wipe my tears,
u kiss me,
u hug me,
u took care of me like no one has ever does,
u are the first lady in my life who makes me belief tat im a priority,
u are the first lady in my life who nvr stop saying i love you,
u are the first lady in my life tat i can nvr get bored of,

if a genie was to appear infront of me rite now,
i'll only ask for one wish,
its for us to be together forever,
coz wif u,
i trust tat we're able to overcome anything,
i have no 2nd toughts and i will nvr,
i'll do my best to make u happy,
i'll do my best to make u smile,
i may not be much and im srry,
if i could get on my knees and beg u, i would,
i'll beg for u to keep me, keep me close n dont let go...

i love u Zee,
i love u so very much,
i love u more den i love myself, (LOL) *another anti-climax thingy* heee~ =)
i love u, i rlly do.